Ode to Wally-World

Five pairs of dress socks… check.
New reasonably priced leather shoes… check.
Off brand tortilla chips (they taste better)… check.

Damn! No souse. OK, put the liver pudding back.

Cheap sliced summer sausage (beef)… check.
Four spicy Bowl Noodles… check.

Trailer trash white girl in grey sweats (you know you’d hit it!)… check!

One pound of All Natural (yeah, right) granola… check.

Hurry now, must… beat… midnight cash drawer changeout!

Neil Diamond on the in-store radio. Damn right they coming to America… by the fracking busload on a Saturday afternoon. But tonight, it’s all quiet, and it’s not even 3 a.m..

Artificial daylight bathing the parking lot. Impromptu family reunions. The joy of a short walk to the car. A brother bumming a bag for his returns (mustn’t give the wrong impression).

There’s so much wrong with Wal-Mart. Yet, there’s so much right with it too.

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