Today, Mitt Romney withdrew his name from the decreasing field of Republican Presidential hopefuls. Signaling his party’s intent to use terror to maintain its death grip on the American psyche, Romney’s last dying gasps were something like:
Any other time in history, I would stand my ground and fight. But this isn’t any other time. This is a time of war, and I’m all for this war. I’ve shown myself to be perhaps the biggest Bush apologist in this campaign. But we all know that a war began by alleged Christians is best fought by someone who at least looks like Jerry Falwell. With my chiseled, clean-cut Mormon good looks, that man is not me.
Besides, when I see the eight years of pent-up rage and frustration in John McCain’s eyes… frankly, I’m terrified. If I stand between him, his war, and his illegal immigrants, I might end up with the Mighty Right’s boner lodged squarely between my cheeks, a position ole Maverick McCain has been in since 2000.
So, as much as I hate to lose, I can’t in good conscience stand in the way of an administration Hell bent on retaining its reign of religious abuse and fraudulent lies over a happily deluded public.
By the way, liberals suck, etc., etc.
Oh, and this just in… Fox, CNN, NPR (shame!), AP, and Other Fake Ass News Outlets Suspend Critical Journalism… as opposed to quitting it altogether.